Aspergers, Work and Social Media

aspergers-work-and-social-mediaIt has been a long time since my last blog post. I have been busy working, and starting a new marketing company. I help business learn how to use social media correctly to promote their brand on Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, and Instagram… As someone who has worked in sales and marketing for 30 years, I found an area where I could really help people succeed. It has also been a lot of fun!

However my new business venture quickly made me realize something; A lot of us with ASD really struggle on social media. We tend to not have that filter. (These days with the news and politics, most NT’s don’t have a filter either!)
So I have been thinking, ‘am I the only Aspie who is in business for himself‘? ‘Are other Aspies having difficulty finding work, or keeping work due to their social media interactions‘? Hmmmmm. If so, then maybe I could focus more on helping others on the spectrum who want to start their own business, or who just need a little help finding a rewarding job. I like to help people, and my passion will always be helping those on the spectrum.

I often look at my son, and I wonder what will he do for a living when he grows up? In my opinion, he would do best if he could start his own company. He loves sports, that is his thing. Although like most of us on the spectrum he lacks the coordination to play on a competitive level. But he can name almost every player for every team from Football to NASCAR. I can see him becoming a commentator, or maybe opening his own store selling specialty sportswear. Who knows. At the same time, we still have not let him have a social media account. Mostly because we do not want him running off his friends by posting 500 sports memes a day.

So what if I could help him? What if I could show him a step by step plan for using social media in a way that gains him more friends instead of running them off? What if I could start laying the foundation now for him to build his personal brand? Maybe by the time he graduates he would have a large following that he could leverage into potential customers. hmmmm

And what if I could help others on the spectrum do the same thing? What if I could offer step by step tools, coaching, mentoring for those who have a dream but struggle a little getting that dream up and running? I know a lot of great people in the ASD community, what if we could offer a summit via webinar or recordings, and give real world pointers to help them be successful on line, and in life? What if I could help just 1 person on the spectrum start a successful business?

The other side to this coin; if you want to start your own business, and you want to promote it online, there are THOUSANDS of people willing to take your money and “teach” you how to be successful. I know because I have looked at these people, and I have taken their courses. and 99% of them SUCK. They just rip people off by regurgitating the same information, filled with empty promises of get rich quick. The person with Aspergers who wants to start their own business would be easy prey for those ‘Gurus’.

I may look into this further. Maybe I can help others. Or, maybe I am wrong, and most people on the spectrum are not interested in this kind of help. I would love to hear your thoughts.

Black and White

My biggest frustration as an Aspie comes from the fact that the world is black and white. This is such a simple concept to me: there is right or wrong, good or bad, truth or lies. Yet most of the world I live in is gray! People never say what they mean. There are subtleties and vagueness. Half truths and unclear instructions.

Please for the love of God, just say what you really mean! And if you refuse to communicate clearly, do NOT get upset with me because I don’t have my Dick Tracy NT decoder ring.
What is real frustrating is when I see this happening to my 8 year old Aspie. He asks for a snack and his mother tells him we are having dinner soon. He didn’t ask about dinner, he asked about a snack. Just tell him no. Otherwise you are setting him up for a meltdown due to frustration. Just answer his question as he asked it. I see this happening all the time; at school his teacher will say ‘don’t you think you should do your math work’? Then the teacher gets upset when he says ‘no I am going to keep coloring’. The teacher, thinking my son is being rude, then tells my little Aspie in a stern voice ‘no you should have finished coloring earlier. Put that away right now and do your math! ‘ Well now my son has a melt down. You ASKED him a question, and he anwered, and then you yelled at him for his answer. You confused him, and you embarrassed him, and and you frustrated him. Instant melt down. More amazing the teacher blames my son when in truth she needs to learn to communicate!!

At the same time I have learned people listen in gray as well. I say ‘what’s for dinner’? I get back ‘I planed steaks but we can have chicken or we can order a pizza’. I just want to know what’s for dinner, and you are flooding my brain. I say ‘text me when you arrive at work’ instead you call me at lunch and wonder why I am mad (maybe because I’ve been worried sick you never made it to work!) I could give a million more examples however my point is this: I live in a black and white world so don’t get mad at me when I can’t do gray if you refuse to do black and white.

As an Aspie, and I am always expected to fit into your world and your rules. All while you make yourself feel better by promoting “awareness” . True awareness comes when you try to be aware of how I think and you try to fit into MY world.